Separating couples: Mediation and legal advice – why you need both
The end of a relationship can be difficult, complex and stressful. Often clients come to us and say: ‘We just want to keep solicitors out of it and go straight to mediation’.
However, whilst using a mediator as part of the process can be hugely valuable in helping both parties agree on a mutually acceptable outcome, you need a solicitor to ensure that what you have agreed is fair and that you understand the legal implications.
Crucially, it’s the solicitor who advises on the fairness of the agreement you have reached and negotiates any slight changes for you to make the agreement into a workable order, or an order the court would be satisfied is fair in the circumstances.
What is the difference between a solicitor and a mediator?
Solicitors and mediators work together to support the client but their roles are quite different.
Mediators are impartial and meet with couples and families to facilitate discussions around key concerns and issues in a constructive way, supporting and navigating parties through the process of separation and divorce, including children and finances. They do not advise either party. They facilitate the meeting but don’t input to the decisions and proposals made.
Solicitors advocate only for their client including:
- Providing independent legal advice to protect your best interests.
- Reviewing proposals from mediation sessions as the process unfolds to identify any potential issues.
- Acting as a sounding board to help prepare financial disclosures and guide strategy in between mediation sessions.
- Ensuring the legal implications of anything agreed in mediation is fully understood by you, their client.
What does mediation involve?
During the mediation process, both parties meet with an accredited mediator to facilitate important issues like financial or child arrangements.
This typically involves a number of meetings during which the mediator helps enable negotiations until an agreement, recorded by the mediator, is reached. This is known as a memorandum of understanding.
The solicitor for each party then reviews this and drafts it into a legally binding agreement, known as a Consent Order, to be approved by the court.
This formalises financial and property agreements between separating couples, legally enforces the division of assets – property, pensions and savings – and, crucially, creates a "clean break" to prevent future financial claims.
Is mediation the same as collaboration?
No, collaborative law is different to mediation.
Unlike mediation, where both parties engage in discussions facilitated by the same person, collaboration involves each party choosing a specialist collaborative family lawyer to act for them individually.
All the participants, clients and lawyers alike, then sign a contract called a Participation Agreement stating a commitment to resolve issues without going to court. This prevents lawyers involved in the collaborative process from doing so if discussions break down.
This means that everyone is absolutely committed to finding the best solutions by agreement, rather than through court proceedings.
Guided by a specialist collaborative lawyer, like those at Wards Solicitors, it offers a way for divorcing or separating couples to work together as a team, face to face, with trained professionals.
As part of a collaborative divorce, access to other specialist services can be arranged as needed including counselling, pension advice and financial planning.
Click here for details of how the collaborative process works.
Get in touch
Wards Solicitors is endorsed as a South West leading firm in the independent Legal 500 guide for 2026 having received overwhelmingly positive testimonials from clients with our Family Law Team highlighted as a recommended service area.
We offer, where appropriate, a free initial half hour consultation to explain the divorce process clearly, outline all your options and help you make a plan going forward.
Please contact any member of our Family Law and Divorce Team for more information.